|Submission Is Not Silence by Elisabeth Julin|
My ears perked up when my friend Tonya Travelstead told me about a blog written by her friend Lizzie Julin. On our early morning walks, we had been discussing the topic of how many in the home school movement think and speak about gender and authority. She knows that I have done a lot of research into the patriarchy movement that goes way beyond the normal, Biblical “men should lovingly lead their families” into an unhealthy authoritarian position. So, was there really a blog for wives called “Submission is Not Silence”? Sounded interesting!
And I still have not told you about the book, Submission Is Not Silence: Boldness from a Quiet Spirit, have I? Well, I always like to give the back story. Long story made even longer, I started reading Lizzie’s blog and began corresponding with her. When she finally published the same-named book, she graciously sent me a copy!
“Fifteen years into our marriage, I had a nagging fear that Eric would leave if I ever countered his strong opinions. As it turned out, I was the one who left him for four days. Taking Isaiah 58 in my head, I drove north to the hometown of friends to quietly pray for my marriage. When I returned, Eric and I looked at each other soberly over coffee in a downtown restaurant. This was when I had my epiphany. Our failures were destroying what we wanted more than anything else, which was a loving, peaceful relationship. After that day of enlightenment, I began to understand my true value to him. I saw his good intentions, commitment to God, character, and determination to stay in our marriage. “Even if you leave, I will stay committed to the marriage and the children,” he told me.
I thought love had died in me, but it soon resonated again. The crises in our marriage accomplished what my silence never could have. I began this journey of many years trying to find wholeness. Our marriage then became more like a game than a war. How simple my part became, and how well it fit, like a perfectly crafted piece of a puzzle among the other pieces of my life; my relationship with God, my husband, and our children.”
“A free, wise, strong female comes up with a bold plan as she seeks the welfare of her husband, her children, and herself. She is what every man longs for (even when he doesn’t know it). He will love ever more fervently the woman who has a mind of her own, who gives to him from her own initiative and female genre of wisdom, and who loves him back because she is free and chooses to. Love that is coerced is not real, and neither is submission that is coerced. Personal dominance, dictatorships in marriage and other forms of mind control that are camouflaged by religion are all unbiblical. No religion or denomination has permission from Scripture to control a woman. Some try hard, but they have to violate Scripture in the process. The biblical truth is that no human being is justified coming between you and God. In the end of time, when it is your turn to stand before God, you will face Him alone.
Marriage is an institution created by God to be the very foundation of the happiness and personal growth of a man and woman. United to “the head,” she as the “body” builds her house. She is his closest confidante, counselor and friend. Women who fulfill their key roles on the stage of life will move an entire culture closer to God.”
Submission Is Not Silence isn’t a difficult book to read; it is more like a warm, friendly chat over coffee with a wise older Titus 2 mentor. She understands the realities and challenges because she has lived through them. Lizzie and Eric, the parents of three grown sons, have now been married for over 37 years — and they are best friends! Wow! In this day and age, that’s quite something!
- Remember Who You Are! In God’s Image, Yet Unique
- A Resemblance of the Holy Spirit: Assuming Your Powerful, Positive Role
- The Science of You: Knowledge is Power
- God Honors You: The Bible Speaking Directly to You
- Totally Unique: Created for Such a Time as This
- Equal Opposites: Both in the Image of God
- A Calling: Thriving in Your Dominion
- Keep Your Heart There: The Center of Every Universe
- Counterparts: A “Threefold Cord”’
- On Stage: The Female Lead
- The Power of Influence: To the Ends of the Earth
- The Head: His Logic and Strength on Your Side
- The Race: Finishing the Course
Take a peek at the Submission Is Not Silence blog, web site, and Facebook page. (Please note that the web site might have some down time on Saturday, July 23, 2011 for maintenance!) Her first post on the blog is one of my favorites: Ponder It, Then Speak the Truth in Love.
You can order the book, in print or digital version, here: http://submissionisnotsilence.com/book/
This blog post is part of my series on gender and authority. You can read the other posts here:
You may also wish to read:
Help for Hurting Marriages
Honesty, Respect, Leadership, and Academic Success